A Battle Worth Fighting

Laundry was folded and ready to be put away, and guess whose chore that was, my little warriors of course.

He decided he didn’t want to do his chore last night so he asked for a different one. (Usually in the past when he wouldn’t do his chore I would do his and he would get mine, which was usually a chore far worse/harder than his and he would regret not doing his own.) This was a little different because there really was nothing else to be done, so I simply replied, “Sorry, but that’s the last chore left so you can’t switch with mine because there are no other chores to do.

Well he didn’t want to do the laundry so he decided to dump the entire bin of folded clothes on the floor, and he made sure nothing was left folded.

“And I’m NOT Cleaning that up!” he stated as he continued to throw random objects at the pile of clothes scattered about. The throwing stopped when he grabbed a candle in a glass jar and shattered that to pieces.

I surprisingly kept cool even at that outburst however inside I was really upset. I shook the glass off all the clothes and put them in a pile on the side along with the other things he threw, and I removed all the glass from the carpet and took it out side to shake off. I came back in and began to eat the muffin that we were going to share. (The deal was he would get some if he displayed good behavior that evening, which he did until this stunt.)

“I want some!” were the next words out of his mouth.

“Sure, no problem, you can have some as soon as that carpet gets vacuumed and the clothes are folded. Here I’ll save you some.”

“I WANT THE MUFFIN!” he commanded.

“Okay, I’ll be happy to give you some as soon as that floor gets cleaned up.”

He clearly was not going to start cleaning so I began to read my bible on the couch and he was irritated. He began kicking me and hitting me, which initially I tried to ignore but, he needed to know this was not acceptable. I grabbed his hands and crossed them like he would be hugging himself, so he could not hit me. I also had to sit behind him on the floor with my legs crossed over his so he could not kick me. The squirming and wiggling and body thrusting was taking place meanwhile the dramatic cries of how he couldn’t breath, and I was ‘hurting’ him were happening. After a while of crying and exerting some energy, he promised to stop hurting me so I let him go. To my surprise he actually did stop.

I went to my room and began to cry and pray for my son, and this situation. I opened my bible and flipped through trying to take my eyes off this situation and seek wisdom in focusing on Jesus.

He led me almost immediately to the parable in Mark 9 ‘Jesus Heals a Boy Possessed by an Impure Spirit.’ Although the parable is titled this, it is an analogy for a generation with a lack of faith, because the people do not believe that they could drive the impure spirit out and even ask Jesus IF He could do anything. Jesus replies to them “Everything is possible for one who believes.” (I did and do believe Jesus could help me then just as He has many times.) In the story, He rebukes the impure spirit and commanded it to never enter the boy again. Later the disciples ask why they couldn’t drive it out and Jesus replies with, “This kind can come out only by prayer.”

That was the answer I needed! Prayer!

I fell asleep shortly after and I guess my son came to bed at some point in the night. Yes he was tired the next morning however through a little humor we kept things positive.  Prayer really works and what a difference it made! My son was told that he would not be able to go to his dad’s tonight until all the clothes were picked up and the other items that he threw. To my surprise, most of it got cleaned up, until we ran out of time, and had to go to work/school. For his compliance, I told him he would be able to go but as soon as he got back, the little bit he had left would have to be put away. (Once upon a time, I would not have stuck to my guns and ended up cleaning for him, but I’ve learned that this does not teach him anything, only that my word means nothing. Even though he struggled to put the clothes away, I know he will reconsider the next time he gets angry and wants to dump the clothes; even better is that he will have learned that he is responsible for his own actions and there are consequences for them. This made the struggle worthwhile and I feel good on my journey to becoming a powerful parent!)

(One year ago when I saw this similar behavior in my son, I felt God telling me through other people that I really needed to start praying over my son at night and any chance I could. I started this journey and soon saw changes in my son. I guess I got lazy or thought that because the changes happened I no longer needed to pray. Well three weeks or so ago, this behavior has resurfaced and has been quite a battle.

I have started and intend to maintain a strong prayer life through interceding for my son, and declaring who he is in Christ, calling forth his destiny. I will not cease just because I see results this time.

“Father, I thank you for my mighty warrior son who is so smart, brave, courageous, gentle and kind. I thank You that he is a mighty worshiper who will follow You all the days of his life. Thank You for the great calling on his life to lead his generation, hearts and souls to the kingdom and glory of God. Lord I thank You that You protect him everywhere he goes and for the angels that never leave his side as a hedge of protection around him. Thank You that he will choose to serve You all the days of his life and that You give him the wisdom and discernment to make wise choices, and see life as if looking through Your eyes. I entrust his life to You and choose to let go of control and die to my own plans daily so that he and I may lead a life that emulates You daily. Thank You that favor and blessings surrounds my son and will pour out into future relationships. Lord help me to find new and creative ways to teach my son to hone his energy and will into leadership qualities that will be used for serving You. Please help me to never grow weary in praying for my son and in parenting him. I thank you that you entrusted his life to me, I love him and I bless him, in Jesus Name, Amen.”

M.O.A.W.